Daniel Scanlon
Articles
OP-ED: I’m Smiling Due to My Joy!
October 2, 2022 at 2:50 pm
A failed situationship did not derail my life for four months!
Woah! Mid-Tier Influencer/PPE Major Realizes the Internet Is Already Over
September 26, 2022 at 8:57 am
This kid definitely went to Exeter.
Wowza! Locust Walk Reimagined Thanks to Penn-BlackRock Partnership
September 20, 2022 at 12:20 pm
Preposterous! Sure, snake-game tile patterns work for the technocratic healthcare managers of the world, but the New Sincere era calls for more garish tile displays.
EXCLUSIVE: The Inside Scoop on Liz Magill’s Synesthesia
September 15, 2022 at 9:50 am
When shown the Stanford insignia, reminiscent of her former employer, Magill responded, “Somewhere between Elizabeth Holmes and petrichor.”
I'm Healing My Inner Child by Posting on Sidechat
September 5, 2022 at 11:28 am
He has a spelling test tomorrow.
BREAKING: Girl in Off-Campus Sorority Hat Says “It's Giving,” Whole Table Laughs
March 17, 2022 at 11:45 am
Holy shit. She is so funny.
Photo Essay: Is Nobody Going to Comment on My Petiteness?
March 2, 2022 at 11:35 am
The world is crumbling before my micrometer-wide eyes!
Wharton Student Opens Dictionary To Random Page, Discovers “Middle Class” On Page 453
February 23, 2022 at 12:36 pm
"Ballpark like … 800k. Y’know, not struggling, but not necessarily raking in the dough.”