How to Avoid Getting Covid
I found this website called Corona Cures XXX that gave a lot of cures that haven’t been circulated by mainstream medicine, among other things.
Hillel Weitzman
Call for Action: Make Babies Second Class Citizens
I’m prepared to weather whatever resistance I am met with by mothers, fathers, and every other fucker under a baby’s conspiratorial spell.
How to Avoid Getting Covid
I found this website called Corona Cures XXX that gave a lot of cures that haven’t been circulated by mainstream medicine, among other things.
Never Have I Ever with Penn Class of 2025
This past weekend I got the chance to play Never Have I Ever with Penn Class of 2025...the entire Penn Class of 2025.
Call for Action: Make Babies Second Class Citizens
I’m prepared to weather whatever resistance I am met with by mothers, fathers, and every other fucker under a baby’s conspiratorial spell.
OP-ED: Penn Board of Trustees Votes to Begin Annual Child Sacrifices to Welcome the Harvest, and I FW It.
I know what you’re all thinking: Aren’t there so many better reasons to sacrifice children than to welcome the harvest? The answer is no, there isn’t.
You Know Hemo’s Food Truck? You Were Right, Hemo Is Short for Hemorrhoids
We’ve all been there - 2AM on a Thursday night, one failed booty call away from dropping out and becoming a full time incel when we open our fridge and find our tub of Hemo sauce, glowing in the midst of so much darkness.
Amy Gutmann Spotted Maskless in Van Pelt Recharging Her Batteries
This past Sunday Penn Police were anonymously tipped by a few students who said they saw “blinding flashes” and heard “what sounded like Optimus Prime ripping a bandaid off his genitalia” coming from VP 4th floor.
