Most Recent
POEM OF THE WEEK: Heaven Looks a Lot Like Facebook Marketplace
Heaven looks a lot like Facebook marketplace
Accepted Class of 2027 Worried There Is Less Recess Time at College
They're the new kids in town.
Epic Fail! Mentioning Circumcision Protest to My Mom Leads to Long Lecture About How if I Had a Penis I’d Be Uncut
What do you call a cheap circumcision? A rip off!
Eavesdropping on Writing Sem Brings Sophomore Tears of Nostalgia
It was a simpler time; I still considered myself pre-med, ate McClelland eight times a week, and protested Castle.
Fun Party Game: Guess Where I’m From but Every Time I Make Up a Fictional South Asian Country
You begin to feel how one usually feels after a few drinks: socially and morally conscious about your racial identity.
We Asked ChatGPT to Write An Article For Us. Here’s What it Produced.
Beep boop beep boop.
Red, Blue…Too Many Colors! Incoming Freshman Doesn’t Know Whether to Throw Up Crip or Blood
These freshmen just come to their Quaker Day, see a mirage of colors, grab the first bandana they see, and get straight to the felonies.
Breaking! Trip Home Reveals Girl That Peaked on Her 8th Grade Trip to Medieval Times Still Weird
Gay !
Fuck Summer Internships, I Want to Be Remembered for My Art
Internships are seasonal, art is forever.
Take THAT, Patriarchy! I (a Girl) Won the Harrison Bracket Challenge
There's a lot of stuff you don't know about me.
Faking Interest, 第四个
An advice column about love, life, and rock n’ roll, run by two of the sveltest broads in all of Pennsylvania.
Announcing Your Summer Internship on LinkedIn, Finding a Subletter, and Other Alternatives to Marijuana to Try This Week
#3 may shock you.
“Hey, Sorry. I Was Kind of Walking Here” and Other Passive Phrases to Prevent Getting Run Over
Flipping drivers “the bird” is an overused and overly-aggressive defense to avoid getting hit by a car. Here are some nicer alternatives to properly communicate with Philadelphia’s finest automobile operators:
Damn, This Lovely Spring Weather Is Making Me Reflect on the Cyclical Nature of It All
How was your spring equinox? I almost forgot to ask.
Stupid Bitch! My Mom Refused to Upgrade Me to First Class on Our Family Trip To Bora Bora
AND that bitch from my history class invited my situationship to formal. Everything. Is. Ruined.
Gatekeeping the Toxic Situationship Soft-Launch Until You Slay
None of these words were in The Bible.
When Penn Became Communist China: The Day I Had to Go Around the Fence on Locust Walk
Next thing you know, you're transferring out of Wharton and into the School of Working Makeshift Iron Blast Furnaces on the College Green.
I'm Done With These Halal Food Trucks, Point Me To The Haram Ones
Having Halal Food Won't Absolve You of Your Sins
Boy Gone Wild: My Licentious Spring Break in Harrisburg, Pennsylvania
Definitely the easiest of the two capitol stormings I have participated in in my lifetime.
Editorial: I Am Not a Veteran
not a veteran I am not a veteran I do not identify as one or more