Guy From Some Northeastern City Wants You to Know It's Not That Cold
With temperatures hitting the low teens, you may be thinking that walking on Locust is a treacherous activity, and start to wonder if you should just stay inside and skip all your classes and/or extracurriculars to avoid the cold. But fear not! A Guy from Random Northeastern City, USA wants you to know that these Philadelphia temperatures? Pfft, nothing compared to his hometown city.
“Sure, we got a bit of snow,” he comments on last weekend’s storm. “But in my city, there are mountains. People couldn’t get out for days ‘cause of all the ice and stuff. So really, we have it lucky.”
The Guy wants to help you learn how to deal with the cold! First, it’s all about gaslighting.
“It’s not even that cold, for real. It’s only cold if you think it feels cold. Jacket? Nah, you don’t need that. I used to go around and wander the city mid-February wearing shorts and a t-shirt.”
Some solid advice to start for sure. Next, you have to adjust your mentality.
“All you West-Coasters and Florida transplants are used to fiery pits of hell. If you don’t like seeing brown slush on the side of the road until April, too bad. Go back to Boca or wherever.”
When asked why this Guy was using up all the hot water in Rodin if it’s not “that cold,” he refused to comment. But his last piece of advice was to “suck it up like a real man.”
*Note: all advice was overheard in discussions with a Philly native.
