The food truck will have the familiar comforts of a perpetually empty chocolate milk machine, tiny oranges that aren’t worth the effort to peel, and too much fucking pineapple. 

The new dorm building, which will be designed by famed 6-year-old architect Calvin and his associate Hobbes, will be built using materials supplied by Amazon@Penn. For instance, walls and structural elements will be constructed with cardboard and fastened with postage tape; recycling bins will be used as toilets. 

As a result of his increased feigning of self-perception, Istem has found himself surrounded by women who are now suddenly attracted to him.