Grad Strike Narrowly Averted as Penn Allows Grad Students to Take Two Entrees from Grommons Instead of One

On Monday night, the University of Pennsylvania reached a tentative agreement with GETUP-UAW, Penn's Graduate Student Union, narrowly avoiding a strike. The strike would have disrupted operations such as recitations, office hours, and assignments being graded weeks after their submission date.

“We are pleased to announce that graduate students are allowed to select two entrees with their Grommons meal exchange,” said a university spokesperson. “We believe this shows our commitment towards supporting our graduate students.”

Graduate students across campus have been rejoicing at their new benefits.

“I genuinely didn’t think they’d budge on this,” said a third-year PhD student, who asked to remain anonymous in fear of losing his second entree. “I’ve never seen change this progressive. It’s revolutionary.”

Another student described the moment she learned the strike had been averted.

“I was in my lab at 1:30 a.m. when I got the email,” she said, visibly shaking. “I just started crying. I even threw up. For the first time in years, I didn’t have to make a choice.”

By Tuesday morning, witnesses had reported a line wrapped around Grommons.

“I swiped and they didn’t stop me,” says one graduate student. “I waited for someone to tackle me. I’ve never felt this free.”

According to inside sources, one graduate student had suggested increasing the amount of sides from two to three. She was immediately executed on the spot.

University officials have also confirmed the additional entree will be deducted from research stipends. UTB is continuing to monitor for updates, as this story is still developing.