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Engineering Student Only Gets Notifications from Team Snapchat

(03/01/20 5:00am)

After a tiring, boring, long, uneventful day in the daily engineering educational grind, Engineering sophomore Danel Pon returns to his dingy double in the high-rises and slumps into his unkempt office chair. He pulls out his 2016 Samsung phone and looks at the cracked screen. For the first time in what feels like weeks, his face melts into a genuine smile.

What’s at the Bottom of the Hill Dining Hall Peanut Butter?

(12/20/19 7:00pm)

After scooping an unholy glob of peanut butter onto my omelet, I can’t help but wonder what’s at the bottom of the peanut butter tub. In recent memory, I have never seen its bottom, and, after consulting with many fellow explorers of the toast condiment station, I discovered that no one else had laid eyes on the bottom of the tub either.  

Penn Chemistry Encourages Students to Nap Elsewhere by Cancelling Classes

(10/26/19 5:18pm)

In an attempt to cut costs, Penn will be dissolving all undergraduate classes offered by Penn Chemistry and replacing the courses with Khan Academy. Current and incoming Penn students will no longer be required to take chemistry courses. Despite the removal of chemistry courses, Penn will still require students who need chemistry credit for their majors to fulfill the chemistry requirements. Thus, Penn will require credit-seeking students to take a cumulative chemistry credit exam at the end of each semester. To aid students in preparation for the test, the Penn Chemistry website now redirects to Khan Academy.