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SAC Releases New Guidelines for Having Pizza at GBMs

NEWS | Seyoung Kim
Sun, Sep 23, 2018

To pursue their mission of promoting a positive club culture on campus, the Undergraduate Assembly and Student Activities Council have partnered to release a set of guidelines on having pizza at club GBMs. The exhaustive rules cover the particularities of which pizza stores are recommended, which toppings are acceptable, and which utensils are necessary for serving pizza.

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SAC Releases New Guidelines for Having Pizza at GBMs

NEWS | Seyoung Kim Sunday, Sept. 23, 2018Sun, Sep 23, 2018

To pursue their mission of promoting a positive club culture on campus, the Undergraduate Assembly and Student Activities Council have partnered to release a set of guidelines on having pizza at club GBMs. The exhaustive rules cover the particularities of which pizza stores are recommended, which toppings are acceptable, and which utensils are necessary for serving pizza.


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Sophomore Wakes up Happy and Excited to Take on Day

NEWS | Sammy Gordon Sunday, Sept. 23, 2018Sun, Sep 23, 2018

College sophomore Alexis Tremblay was woken up by natural light peaking through her blinds.  She looked out her window, saw the blue sky and swaying trees, and thought, “Wow. I’m lucky to be here at Penn.  I have a lot to be thankful for and I am excited to take on this day.”




Photo by Lea Eisenstein / The Daily Pennsylvanian

After Three Years, Senior Still Hopelessly Confused About How to Spell Gutmann

NEWS | Lea Eisenberg Friday, Sept. 21, 2018Fri, Sep 21, 2018

Reflecting back on the past three years, College senior Jason Klipp thought he had Penn just about figured out. He knew the fastest route through campus, the coolest classes in his major, and the best places to drop a deuce between classes. But on Wednesday, it became painfully clear that there was one aspect of Penn life he was never able to master: accurately spelling out the surname of our great leader, Dr. Amy Gutmann.


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Here Are 5 Definitive Ways to Tell If Your Roommate Is a Psychopath

OPINION | Becky Molinoff Friday, Sept. 21, 2018Fri, Sep 21, 2018

So you moved in about three weeks ago, and it has been a whirlwind. After meeting your roommate, hanging out a ton with them during NSO, and then completely ditching them when you made your real friends, you’re beginning to notice some weird things they do. After speaking with several Penn scientists and psychopaths we know personally, we’ve compiled a list of five foolproof ways to tell if your roommate is a psychopath.


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OP-ED: If I Don't Go to My First Class, I Won't Go to Any Class

OPINION | Seyoung Kim Thursday, Sept. 20, 2018Thu, Sep 20, 2018

My roommate frequently misses her 8 a.m. recitation. Still, she makes an effort to attend her afternoon classes, saying she wants to "make the most of her tuition money." In fact, most of my friends, even if they skip one of their classes regularly, usually go to the others in order to stay on top of the course material.




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BREAKING: Jeb Bush Walks Down Locust, Literally No One Cares

NEWS | Sammy Gordon Wednesday, Sept. 19, 2018Wed, Sep 19, 2018

On Wednesday, University President Amy Gutmann and Provost Wendell Pritchett named former Florida Governor Jeb Bush a non-resident Presidential Professor of Practice for the 2018-2019 academic year. Though few are sure what this actually means for Penn, even fewer care about Jeb Bush at all.


Photo from pxhere / CC0

Watch Out: 28-Year-Old Senior Has Just Been on the Same CIS Waitlist for 7 Years

NEWS | Kasra Khadem Wednesday, Sept. 19, 2018Wed, Sep 19, 2018

Albert Song (E '19) is just one credit away from graduating. He was also one credit away from graduating last year, the year before, and even back in 2011. No, he hasn't taken a gap decade. And no, he hasn't even left Penn. He has spent the past seven years of his life emailing professors, counting down until advance registration, and failing to get into CIS 518: Neural Deep Data Machine Intelligence—the only class that he needs to graduate.


Photo by Secondarywaltz / CC0

OP-ED: Let's Try Planning Fall Break For Months, Drop the Ball And Just Get a MegaBus to NYC, I Guess

OPINION | Mackenzie Lukas Wednesday, Sept. 19, 2018Wed, Sep 19, 2018

Hey pals, what’s the haps? I know we’re still rotting away in the offices at the jobs our parents so graciously awarded us, but we NEED to do something fun for fall break this year. I was thinking Amalfi Coast? Maybe Dubai? I’d also be down for Sydney! It’ll be so simple to arrange a quick little weekend trip with my best friends.







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Sophomore Banished to Hell by Protester Was Already in Electrical Engineering

NEWS | Karman Cheema Sunday, Sept. 16, 2018Sun, Sep 16, 2018

Nick Menon (E ’21) was taking his daily stroll to DRL for an engineering lecture when he saw a large congregation of protesters near College Green. “I just saw a lot of people yelling for no apparent reason. A minute later, I got berated for supporting women’s rights and vaccination, and somebody told me that Dean Furda was the third Antichrist.”