After viscerally describing his last sexual experience with a girl whose name he can’t remember, Rothstein simply sighed and smiled. “You know, there’s just something especially sacred about being with someone who has only been with you.”
Protests are expected at the Spring Fling celebration where Rida intends to make his statement. Needless to say, it will be ‘Going Down for Real’ this Saturday.
After viscerally describing his last sexual experience with a girl whose name he can’t remember, Rothstein simply sighed and smiled. “You know, there’s just something especially sacred about being with someone who has only been with you.”
Have you ever seen a bush? A full fledged, magical, flourishing bush. Well, I have. And I saw it at Magic Gardens.
Protests are expected at the Spring Fling celebration where Rida intends to make his statement. Needless to say, it will be ‘Going Down for Real’ this Saturday.
The neighborhood legend is making his big-stage debut April 17th at Penn Park.
The leadership change comes after weeks of deadly United States strikes on Iranian leadership.
As the witches walk through the rain, the water will seep into the soles of their suede ballet flats — only after ruining the softness of the material forever.
I expected to sit down for a sober cup of coffee at 3 p.m. EST, but the combination of daylight savings and my being accustomed to Iran Standard Time (I’m an empath) led me to lose track and start slamming back Cutwaters at noon.
Today was the worst day that I’ve ever had in my entire career at Penn.
You already gave your kid weed and shrooms, might as well fully commit and make your child the coolest kid on the block.
“You’re up 34% from last week, for an average of six hours and 14 minutes.”
The Department of State announced late last Wednesday that it would contract with the Alpha Phi International Women’s Fraternity, Eta Iota Chapter to provide intelligence on the rapidly evolving situation in Iran.
Undergraduate students enrolled in the Wharton School of Business at the University of Pennsylvania will be exempt from service.
President Trump, please send me to the front lines. If you don’t, I might have to work in consulting.
While not a novel idea, only a handful of past presidents have attempted to try this: On Tuesday, the Department of War announced an unlimited number of spots for willing participants in the Middle East “Freedom from Life” operation.
Danya Dzebissov, a junior pursuing a mathematics degree within the College of Arts and Sciences, has recently distinguished himself in a field his professors have yet to formally recognize: reel analysis.
Further changes involve the introduction of a loud, fluorescent light-induced buzzing noise in the Goldstein Undergraduate Study Center, a replacement of all group study rooms with chastity study carrels, and the addition of cushioned toilet seats.
With so many causes competing for attention, the Panhellenic Council has chosen to direct all proceeds toward animal cruelty — specifically, ensuring that dogs across Philadelphia have access to proper nail grooming through their partner organization, Nails N Paws.
It's the best week of the year for some.
“This level of commitment is what we usually only see in day traders and people refreshing their ex’s Instagram,” said one behavioral psychologist.
“In this world nothing can be said to be certain, except death, taxes, and added protein,” - Ben Franklin, more or less.
Solutions by The State News
